Communion

As I sat in church yesterday listening to the invitation to take communion then waiting for the elements to be passed around, I bowed my head with prayers of adoration for who Christ is and what he has done, prayers of forgiveness for the critical, judgmental and selfish spirit that I had embraced, forgiveness for delegating to God what I though he needed to do and how he needed to do it, and thanking him for all the blessings that he has laid before me that I so many times take for granted. My prayers continued, but as I let my thoughts quietly fade away, I began to recognize thoughts of HIM; His love, his forgiveness, his authority, his grace, and his mercy. These elements that were being distributed and taken internally were reinforcements as to my beliefs, my acceptance, my dependence, my appreciation, my desperate longings for God and my undeserved grace, forgiveness and continued direction from God.

Too many times I find that I allow my thoughts to rest in the weeds instead of soar in the winds of trust in God's heavenly authority. I continue over and over to make my life about me and forgo the reality that it is about God himself and his glory. For me to be able to live peacefully without anger, discontent, discouragement or frustration, I have to not only accept that fact but embrace. Do I? Oh sometimes I am on a good roll but so many times just a flip of a situation will set me up for emotional resentment. And then I feed it and embrace that, instead of living under the influence of God's sovereign power. Which brings me to my point...living under the influence. We casually toss that term around when we are talking about drugs or alcohol or even people. But as I drank the wine and ate that tiny little piece of bread yesterday I had to ask...am I under the influence of Christ himself. Do I live that way? I so wish I could answer yes....but in reality the answer is only sometimes. I might look good on the outside, but covers are too often deceiving. Living undercover is one way to deny or avoid God's truth. I know my thoughts....and what I allow to generate them...and too many times it is not CHRIST.

I wake up each morning as we all do, and know that today I have a choice. Will I allow Christ to be the one who influences me in my thoughts, my decisions and my actions or will I sell our to self. And it is not just a daily decision but a moment by moment decision. Am I going to look for God's good and work a positive framework into the setting of my thoughts or am I going to maintain a seat of self centered control relating all things back to how I think things should be handled and allow the framework to be on negative standing. Sometimes it takes a real effort to swing over to the good side, but really it is more of an effort to keep from choking in the weeds.



Matthew 26: 26-27

While they were eating, Jesus took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to his disciples, saying, "Take and eat; this is my body."Then he took a cup, and when he had given thanks, he gave it to them, saying, "Drink from it, all of you.


It goes back to influence. The one we feed is the one who grows. If I want to be influenced by Christ, then I have to seek Christ. It is that simple. It continues to amaze me that Christ, the creator of all things, the God over all gods, the one who loves without conditions, who has sacrificed his life in order to save mine and yours, waits patiently for me to come to him. I, who am completely undeserving and many times unyielding, have no rights except that I a his child and I belong to him. Yet I am given access to his power, his strength and his wisdom and not only am I given passes to come to his throne but I am encouraged to come to him in humility asking for power and help. And the deal is...I forego all of that. And why? Because I have the audacity to consider myself more worthy. Now really?

I need the reminder of humility, over and over and I am grateful that I belong to a church that stands on the truth of the word of God. The teachings both in Sunday School and church and helps me to elevate my thoughts beyond the earthly weeds to the heights of Christ, who is the true influence of power and grace, who has no flaws or unwanted side effects.

It was just a small sip of wine and a tiny piece of bread...but it was a reminder that, at that moment, I was feeding He who lives within me with a respected sense of appreciation, honor and awe. Christ is to be honored before all men, but it is my heart that I must concern myself with first...and what he decides and how he manages others, is for his purposes, not for my judgment. Change me first Lord, and allow my influence to be a reflection your influence on my life.

Dear Lord, Thank you for communion; a time of reflection upon the power and authority that you alone have, a time of repenting for the attitudes of selfish manipulation that I have accessed and embraced and a time of redirecting my life so that I will have the courage and strength to live under the continued influence of your loving grace. Amen

Praise God wherever you are and whatever situation He has allowed you to be in . . . His glory will shine through!