Meltdown

The babysitter had the kids all dressed up with hair combed, and they were waiting for me in the front yard. Jennifer's children, William, 4, Catherine 3 and baby Molly were coming to my house to spend the night. Jenn and Jon had left on Friday for Jon's high school reunion in Memphis. They spent the first night at home and them I grabbed them after a shower I had had at my house the next day. They had had a big time all weekend but as it goes when parents are out of town schedules shift and bed times are shuffled and early mornings come even earlier. By Sunday lunch, these kids were worn out. Catherine had the first melt down regarding table seating at lunch, we were eating with Jamie and Blake and baby Sam and cousin Blake, and by the end of lunch William had the next meltdown due to the refusal of a purple tootie roll pop. Nap times were on their way.

When we got back home, we unloaded the car but William, with his arms folded remained seat belted in, so I said when you are ready you come on in. I was getting Molly's bottle ready and I heard the back door open, and the stomps up the back stairs. Catherine loves handing out with the toys upstairs so she had already made her way up. Molly was the patient one, and waited till we got home for her bottle and Mel stayed and fed her while I went to get the kids ready for naps.

By the time I got there, William had ditched his church clothes, changed into khaki shorts and had made his way to the top trundle bed. Arms folded, he sat up straight and was still mad. Catherine laid down without hesitation or even suggestion, for she was oh so ready to take a nap and I sat there for a minute and watched William. (I always sit with them a while when they are ready to sleep.) Bless his little heart he was worn out and completely off schedule and I am sure missed mom and dad. So I headed toward his bed and he watched carefully not knowing what to expect and I put my arms around him and gave his a huge hug, and said you have had terrible manners but I just want you to know I love you to pieces anyway. And I kissed him on the cheek, then reached down and gave Catherine a kiss and headed back to my chair. He immediately melted into his pillow and was asleep in less than a couple of minutes.

Oh, I so wish I knew back then, when I was raising my own children, what I know now. I did not have the patience, the strategy, the faith or the perception that I have with my grandkids. Not that I am getting it all right now, but surely I have matured enough to have learned to love a little better. For as I thought of this interaction with William, I could not help but think of how much God loves me and forgives me day after day for my bad manners. It has to get old, but he keeps on loving me and teaching me and encouraging me to do things his way instead of my own. But my self centeredness, just like my little 4 year old, keeps trying at will to take God's rightful spot.

For those of us who are blessed to have grandchildren, we have an opportunity each time we are with them to display God's grace and act upon the love that we have known through knowing Christ and what he did on the cross to atone for all of our "bad manners". For those who do not have grandchildren or even children for that matter, we too are responsible for trying through our maturity to get it right and
and relinquish our hold on self centered behavior, no matter who we are around.

It is our human nature sometimes to lose our cool, or respond with frustration, or fire away when something has gone awry with our plans. And many times we are burdened with regrets of shame
so great, that we just dig ourselves into a deeper hole thinking we are beyond being able to get out of a mess that we have fallen into. It doesn't matter if we are four or ninety four, we all wrestle with forgiveness. Forgiving ourselves, forgiving others as well as accepting forgiveness from God. God has already given, those who believe in him, his full measure of forgiveness through his life and death and resurrection. But many times it is us who refuse to claim forgiveness, feeling that our shame is much greater than God's love. It isn't... today, or ever. God is a God of forgiveness, and he counts each of us no matter how bad we have messed up to be an adored,loved and cherished child of his. Christ, in his transforming nature through the Holy Spirit not only has the ability to work through our misdirected acts of sin, but incorporates those into lessons he uses to build our character and promote his purposes.

We all are going to be in situations where we mess up, either by word or deed or in attitude. There is only one who has shown himself perfect on this earth, and that is Christ. If we submit to a humble obedience to Christ, and seek to not only know his will but act in it and on it, that is where we will find our greatest victories. He will help us to overcome temptations, our selfish desires and our bad manners, only if we allow him to be an active part of our lives.

William is only four and is just beginning his road to righteousness, a big word for a little person. I look at how old I am and how much I am still learning each day. I thank God each day for his boundless love and
faithful forgiveness, and for hanging in there with me when I mess up. For until we are gently scooped up from this earth and taken to our eternal home, we will need his direction, depend on his forgiveness, and
be forever under his umbrella of grace.

Ephesians 1:7
In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace.

Dear Lord, Help me to look back to you for forgiveness and acceptance when I fall from your grace. And help me to forgive others who have fallen from my contrived expectations. Help me to follow your lead when I am confronted with problems, disappointments, insecurities and inadequacies that are too big to face on my own. And Lord, please help lift me out of any deep hole that I have dug myself, and fallen into. Amen


Praise God wherever you are and whatever situation He has allowed you to be in . . . His glory will shine through!