Night Light

We were all geared up to take my two little guys with us to the football game last weekend. But at the last minute William got strepped throat and had to cancel, much to the disappointment of all of us. But Blake was still game without him and so off we went on Friday, knowing that we would be coming home from Austin, right after the game on Sat night for baby Molly's baptism Sunday morning. We got in late Friday, not leaving til after work, and after the I-10 detour through Luling. (We stopped on the road for dinner at a little country place named Blake's in Luling, best chicken strips ever.) By the time we got to our spot it was bedtime.

I had gotten a nudge from mom that there might be a hiccup with bedtime. And sure enough, you could tell something was bothering my little friend. Blake and I talked about it I realized that he didn't want to sleep in the bunk room alone. Not having William as a sidekick changed things a bit for this adventure. But when the rubber really met the road as far as the discomfort, it was being in the room, alone in the dark. I couldn't fix the William part but I did know how to work out the dark. I had a great bright night light, not one of the muted blue things, and it nearly lit up the whole room and things were better immediately. I understood this...for I slept with a night light almost till I was married, and still am a little uneasy and insecure when I am alone and all the lights are out.
Someone once asked me "if you have so much faith, then why is the alone in the dark thing such a big deal. God is with you." I couldn't answer her, I just knew there was something inside of me, a wall of resistance I guess and even after all thee years, I was still having a hard time breaking it down. I still like night lights when I am alone. Even this week Mel was out of town for a few nights and the same deal. I stayed busy, kept George the cat and Bentley the lab, in for a while, kept the TV going and piddled around the house until the wee hours the night. But when morning finally came, and it was a new day, I was again grateful to God for keeping watch over me through the night.

I again considered the comfort that the night light gave to Blake, and kind of stewed on that a while and again asked myself why is it that I am so restless when I am alone at night. What am I really afraid of? I am not the scaredy cat type usually but this "in the dark in the quiet of the night" just makes me restless. Always has! But I have got to figure out how to conquer this. So, I thought: God has all the answers so somewhere in his word there has got to be some tools that I can use to chisel this monster down to size. I am too old to be dealing with this.

These are some verses that I found that helped:
1) Genesis 1:4
God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness.
2) Exodus 13:21
By day the LORD went ahead of them in a pillar of cloud to guide them on their way and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light, so that they could travel by day or night.
3) 2 Samuel 22:29
You, LORD, are my lamp; the LORD turns my darkness into light.
4) Psalm 18:28
You, LORD, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.
5) Psalm 27:1
Of David. The LORD is my light and my salvation- whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life- of whom shall I be afraid?
6) Psalm 89:15
Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you, who walk in the light of your presence, LORD.
7) Psalm 119:105
Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.
8) Psalm 139:10-12
even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.
9) 1 Peter 2:9
But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.
10) 1 John 1:5
This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.

But after reading these verses and pondering on them a bit, this was my conclusion: Simply, if God is light and God is present with me always then it would prove to be true that I would never be in the dark. So, why do I feel scared at times when darkness comes hovering in? Because I have lost sight of the light, His light. And the deeper I dug the more I realized that there are times when we may not literally be in the dark, but we are presented with darkened circumstances that catch us completely off guard and we have no
light to shine on the solution. Oh but in these verses we read that the light is always there for those who truly believe in the God who created the universe. He is there, he is present to help us overcome the darkness that is within us, upon us, or overshadowing us, if only we turn our restlessness to fear over to His light for fear is born in darkness. Either we can crawl under the covers of fear or
let his light shine upon the monsters and expose then for what they really are; small, and insignificant ...in comparison to God's mighty power, his word of truth and his spirit of authority.

This all sounds good and great but I will only know its true worth if I practice it the next time I have the opportunity to be in the dark. My little Blake (5) was surrounded with light, and fun stories of the day, fluffy covers, the sound of a fan and his fears literally melted into the darkness. I too have that light of security available to me if only I would reach into my heart and turn it on, and let it shine on the monsters that are lurking in closets of my mind. When exposed for what they really are, small and insignificant, they hold little light in comparison to the mighty glow of God the Father almighty.

Dear Lord, We all have some monsters who are lurking in the darkened corners of our hearts and our minds. Help us to remember to call on you and ask that your light shine brightly upon us. May you melt away the fear that makes us restless and may we be overcome with the security that comes from your light. Amen

Praise God wherever you are and whatever situation He has allowed you to be in . . . His glory will shine through!