Attitude

Looked out at the pool this morning, floats, noodles, swim rings and diving toys were still scattered about. I grabbed Blake and Sam yesterday for a swim, and as a surprise Jennifer dropped by later int he afternoon with baby Molly, William and Catherine, and then my Molly came home from work. We had an unexpected full house, except for Mel who had a dinner with customers. The girls stayed inside and I jumped in the pool with the "swimmers" and brought Sam. It was a no big deal, nonevent, but it was an afternoon filled with laughts and fun just being together. I pulled hamburger patties out of the freezer, and fed the gang then they had popsicles in the front yard. And in a flash the noise, excitement, chatter and fun had driven away...for it was bedtime.

But sometimes when you are smack dab in the middle of activity you don't realize how special those moments really are, until you take time to reflect on them. Reflection is really where I seem to learn some of my greatest lessons. For reflection is merely a mirror mimicking what I have chosen as important and as a prioity. It is a representation of what I have been involved in good and bad. Whether it is behavior, attitude, or activity.

This was the end of my day but at the beginning of it, I behaved awful. It was to a technician in India who I had been on the phone with for over six hours throughout the weekend who has totally messed with my allready messed up computer. He continued to redo every move without changing anything. It was kind of like that movie Groundhog Day. I lost my cool in frustration, no bad words, oh but such a bad attitude, and angry. Upon reflection, I was no where near the behavior that Christ has called me to be a part of. The tech signed off in frustration himself, and the computer remains in a serious compromised position of malfuntion. It started by the hacking that many of you recieved proof of last week.

So, upon reflection, there were two completely different faces of the EVE that lingers within me. The joyful coutenance filled with blessed gifts of children and granchilden about me, versus the frustrated angry contenance brought on by a flawed computer and a far away technician. Upon prayerful examination, I realized that I let the small stuff get hold of my energies, my focus,
my attitude, and my determination to fix things...now. Instead of looking at the situation and calmly asserting that it is what it is and rearranging my priorities and plans accordingly, I let the insignificant overrule the significant.

Yesterday's morning was such an extreme contrast to yesterday's afternoon....and so was my behavior. But you see I got off my God track...and allowed self to be my designated driver. Being around grandkids, it is easy for me to remain focused on the good stuff...I mean really, they are precious and fun, I can say that becasue I am the grandmother, but I have to learn to have same that attitude of joyful resignation regardless of the situation. Thank God that he continues to work on me and temper my emotions and help me to reflect on how to better incorporate his ways into being my ways. You would think I could get a handle on that after all my years of being taught the same lesson, but there contiunues to be a constant force of self centeredness that pops into the driver mode.

Reflection does help us to see what paths we have chosen to take in life but it also helps us to truly hold onto the precious times that are part of our everyday lives, that we sometimes take for granted. I need to learn from my misguided attempts to control, but I also need to concentrate on cherishing those times of joy that counter them.

Proverbs 27:19
As water reflects the face, so one's life reflects the heart.

Water does reflect the face, just as our live's reflect our heart. When I behave badly I have to consider who has got hold of my heart. Have I let God have control or have I taken it back from him and tried to handle it on my own. He is not only a much better manager than I of a the one heart that is within me, but he is the one who controls the beats.

May I live in appreciation of the life he has given me, the blessings that are before me, the people who he has placed in my path, and the light that he has given to me to share. One heart beat at a time, may God transform my attitude and my behavior when things are difficult, and help me to become closer to doing things his way. For then in reflection, His light will be able to shine through me.

Dear Lord, Oh how you show me how inadequate I am when I try to go about life on my own. Thank you for the clear lessons. Amen


Praise God wherever you are and whatever situation He has allowed you to be in . . . His glory will shine through!